I sensed the Lord’s affirmation regarding my views on “Church Membership.” I ran into a couple of brothers who were very, very involved with church ministry at one time. One brother became a pastor at a New Hope church plant. Our conversation led me to write the devotional below.
Former Church Members Hurt by Leadership
There are too many stories about people being hurt by the church and spiritual leadership. It’s difficult to contextualize because everyone’s situation and experience is unique and personal.
Do you know someone who no longer attends church because they were hurt by a pastor or another church member? I do. In over 35 years of pastoral ministry, I’ve spoken and prayed with many who’ve been wounded in and by the church.
As a shepherd, I’ve tried to meet people where they are, knowing every story is different. But I also recognize the weight of responsibility spiritual leaders carry when someone walks away from fellowship because of hurt.
If that’s you—if you’ve been hurt by “us” as pastors or leaders—I want to say: I’m sorry. Please forgive us. I pray healing can begin through the love and grace of Jesus, and through honest confession, repentance, and prayer together.
“Now we see things imperfectly, like puzzling reflections in a mirror, but then we will see everything with perfect clarity. All that I know now is partial and incomplete, but then I will know everything completely, just as God now knows me completely.”
1 Corinthians 13:12 NLT
In 1 Corinthians, Paul addresses Christian leaders and families caught in conflict. Their differing convictions and passions have led to divisions within the church. Imperfect people—like all of us—carry imperfect and often puzzling perspectives. The way we view life, people, and situations deeply shapes our relationships. This reality is common to us all.
Within the church—especially in how we serve, lead, and relate—these differences matter. When spiritual leaders are driven by personal ambition, the need for recognition, or the pursuit of success, it can cloud their motives. That kind of pollution doesn’t just affect them, it can wound the very people they’re meant to serve.
So it was with the 2 brothers I ran into – who were hurt by leadership. Both brothers still have a love for God but a distaste for the “church.” As I said in our Belonging to God’s Kingdom and New Hope Mānoa teachings, God’s people are valuable members of the Family of God!
“If you are in a predicament with the church, let’s come together, and … Confess our sins to each other and pray for each other so that we may be healed. The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results.“
James 5:16 NLT
Prayer
Lord Jesus, we come to You with honest hearts. For those who have been hurt by spiritual leaders or church communities, we ask for healing, restoration, and grace. For those of us who have caused hurt—knowingly or unknowingly—grant us humility, courage to confess, and hearts that seek reconciliation. Let Your love mend what’s been broken, and may Your Church be a place of healing, not harm. Amen.
